Bird Shit

Chocolate coated ice-cream treats can be terribly sore on the old gnashers if bitten with anything from the incisors to canines. a strategic rotation of the icy treat and pressure applied,with the molars,increased slowly ....CRACK...... no taste not yet.....warm saliva melts the chocolate....taste.. here it comes...rushing over my tongue.......IMPOSTER... you are not chocolate.... DISAPPOINTMENT ...

melts like the plastic browness giving way to shame ......i wish i could have afforded the magnum..still though weather is nice,i am looking good.plenty of gigs...women... some French some american....

they think i am a mysterious ....international......they are to me.....freed from the suffocating connectedness of life on this green and grey little island...oh you went to school with her?........you played rugby with him....he was caught with his finger in his bum..blah blah.... they do not care about ...well, you know...

spending a lot of time in the Green, reading. brought muller corner yoghurt's. they were snack size today and it made me feel unmanly.friend said something about masturbating in the morning.... maybe its that...maybe its the finger?..... thought....perhaps, that the bird shitting on me 10 days ago had changed my luck.i wonder did it change the other guy who also got shit on him. he cleaned his off. i rubbed mine in, maybe that makes a difference?... it isnt REALLY the bird shit or else i would go..... run under a kettle of kites......no its a positive cognitive dissonance...its not the bird shit ...winner in the grand national...met lovely girl...on the lash for 6 days... surrounded by people....happy?...it cant all be my doing maybe its the bird shit...i know it isnt but it probably is.............. ...at least that s what i keep telling myself...... deliberate lies are.....i feel like i am telling myself deliberate lies..but at least i am being honest with you...as honest as i can be..the finger?..maybe once...life is not bad but could it be better...an ice-cream.....a few gigs....a dream....sex...drink...smokes....is that enough.....probably not....but maybe i can convince myself it is..maybe i DO need the bird shit...that s just conjecture...what do i know i do not have letters after my name or numbers in my a/c.... haven't done much with my life really except for think about it..maybe thats enough?...no...yes..yes.....thought it might wait.....but with a stubborn boorishness it keeps carrying on.......wait for me .......never does,maybe one day soon..... i will catch up...... SURVIVING........ really isn't that all you need for life to be a success.....very few of us get to thrive......and the sun was shining......blackness to come